Cerita Amna Hafiya

Harini rasa nak cerita pasal Amna la. Lagi 4 bulan, cukup la umur Amna Hafiya 2 tahun. Amna ni memang manja sangat lelagi dengan abah dia. Kalau abah dia tinggal sekejap, menangis macam kena pukul. Haritu, keluar rumah sama-sama sebab husband meeting pkl 10. Sekali, dia tengok abahnya tak masuk kereta sama-sama, menangis siap pukul-pukul tingkap. Mama dah tak laku.

Bila anak dah besar, rasa macam sekejap je. Amna jenis yang tak boleh paksa ke hapa. Tambah kalau suruh sayang. Ada hari dia kasi la cium sikit tapi kebanyakkan hari, takdenya. Melainkan, dia tahu dia buat salah, kena marah dengan mama. Tetiba ja peluk, sambil muahhhh. Hahaha..sejuk hati mak. Terus tak sampai hati nak marah. Ini memang taktik dia.

Kalau ajar cakap pun, selalunya dia pandang ja. Nanti tetiba dia ulang balik apa yang kita ajar. Dulu favourite dia Upin-Ipin. Hari-hari mintak nak tengok. Kena la restrict jugak. Mana boleh nak mengadap phone/tv je kan. So sekarang macam dah kurang sikit. Kadang on kan dvd bagi tengok frozen. Sebab mama nak buat house chores. At least, bila ada song ke hapa, sekejap tu boleh la dia layan. lepas tu sambung keluarkan periuk belanga. And yang kelakar sebab dia panggil Elsa tu Aisha. haha..dah jadi nama melayu.

Rambut Amna dah panjang. Mamanya nakk sangat buat pesyen-pesyen rambut. Ada baby girl, nak jugak bagi kiut-kiut kan. Haaaa tapi, kalau letak je atas kepala dia, nanti dia cabut. Huhu..mama dah teringin nak beli headband lelawa. Tapi pasrah jerla. Tunggu nanti dah besar sikit la kot. So now, kena senyap-senyap pakaikan klip rambut. Bertahan la lama sikit.

Since dah ada adik ni, awal-awal dulu takde la dia main sangat dengan adik. agaknya dia pun taktau dia ada adik. Hehe..baru-baru ni aje panggil adik sambil cium-cium. Kadang mama tinggal Amna and adik dalam bilik. lepas tu mengendap nak tengok Amna buat apa. Alhamdulillah tak penah pulak dia pukul senyap-senyap ke apa. Dia cium ja adik sambil pegang-pegang kepala adik dia. Adik dia memang suka ngan kakak. Kalau dengar suara kakak diam ja kadang dia pun macam nak join main dengan kakak. haha..

Semalam bawa checkup Ammar. Sebab pergi sorang so tinggal la Amna rumah pengasuh dia. Dah tengah hari rasa malas pulak nak masuk lab. Bedua la dengan Ammar kat rumah sambil tunggu orang Astro datang betulkan piring tu. Dah petang ambil kakaknya. Masuk dalam kereta ja, terus panggil adik. Sambil main cak-cak. Adik dia siap ketawa bedekah-dekah. Lega hati mama. Rindu jugak la dengan adik dia.

Last 3 weeks rasanya, time maqrib. Hujan lebat kat luar. Amna tengah tengok channel oasis tu. Tetiba skrin jadi warna hitam. Menangis lari laju-laju pegang kaki apaknya. Start from that day, asik cakap takut ja. Tak pernah dah nak tengok tv kat depan or main sorang-sorang. Minum susu pun nak orang teman. Stress tau kadang-kadang. Nak mandi pun dia menjerit-jerit sambil ketuk pintu. Nak masak asik nak main dekat kaki mama.

But after that, husband jumpa dengan jiran depan rumah, katanya anak dia kena minyak dagu. And ada la makhluk halus yang kacau anak perempuan dia. Dengar cerita tu, terus kitaorang pun takut. Entah Amna ni nampak something tak. Dah la pulak tu. Ada hari dia cakap takut sambil pandang atas. Seram mama time maqrib-maqrib. Nak biar dia main sorang pun tak berani sebab macam kesian pulak dekat dia. Nasib duduk rumah kecik ja. Atleast, suami balik lambat takde la takut sangat. Tapi berharap la fasa takut dia ni cepat berlalu. kesian dia and kesian kami jugak. Sebab memang tak boleh langsung, langsung kena tinggal. Penat emosi kekadang menahan sabar. huhu..

The relationship after 2 babies

Haritu ada terbaca kisah mah yang viral kat internet. Well, taknak comment pasal sikap lelaki itu. But it truly reflect bout me. After having babies, im still searching the best method untuk membahagikan masa. Lagi-lagi sekarang, dah start going to the lab. I admit, sometimes, it was so hard to get ‘me’ time, to pamper myself or to take a rest. Selalunya, laju-laju mandi, tak sempat pun nak cuci rambut. Tambah kalau nak sapu conditioner, lagi la rasa macam buang masa. Dengan si kecik tu dah pandai pusing, setiap masa bedebar ja tinggal atas katil. The worst thing, I get paranoid. Rasa macam terdengar je Ammar nangis. So end up, nak mandi betul-betul, tunggu husband balik, and usually, it’s almost 9pm.

Believe it or not, i even search macam mana cara nak kemas rumah (can view this link http://mengemasrumah.blogspot.com/). Rasa macam kemas rumah tu simple sebab dari kecik memang dah terbiasa, tapi bila baca blog ni, rupanya kemas rumah pun kena belajar tau.

I really want to welcomed him with big smile not dengan bau muntah anak, rambut serabut selalunya sanggul ja and rumah bersepah. Homai, betul-betul macam kapal karam. The thing bout husband is, dia jenis pengemas sikit. HAHA.ok. Isteri pulak jenis, anak dah tidor baru la laju-laju nak kemas rumah. My husband prefer to eat home made cook so, bila tak masak je, rasa bersalah sangat. Kadang tu, dia cakap je nak diet, taknak makan malam, but end up, dia masak maggi la, makan biskut la. Ish tak sampai. Dah la balik penat-penat, lepas tu tolong jaga anak sulung because i have to take care of the baby, kemas rumah and sidai baju (I wonder, what were I do?) and then nothing to feast him.

kadang-kadang baca masalah rumah tangga orang, it will make us think bout us.  It made me want to improve myself. Suami Mah tu complaint sebab Mah dah tak macam dulu, tak sama macam sebelum kahwin. Dulu, ingatkan my husband jenis yang nak isteri sentiasa cantik. Bila tanya dia, he said, dia tak kisah pun pasal gemuk ke hapa mungkin lebih pada kesihatan la kan but he prefer balik rumah, rumah kemas. Yang lain-lain dia tak kisah sangat. Sebenarnya, tak semua suami tu sama kehendaknya. Some like isteri pandai masak, ada yang kalau isteri jaga anak dengan elok dah jadi satu kelegaan. Ada pulak yang jenis tengok rumah kemas pun dia rasa bahagia ( suami saya la tuee). Tapi, jaga kekemasan (bukan kecantikan) penting jugak sebenarnya. Secara tak langsung kita akan rasa good if we take care of ourself.

I want him to eat air tangan isteri. Suka sangat bila dia berselera makan. Rasa puas hati. So usually, petang bila anak dah tidor, barula laju-laju masak. Sesimple mungkin, selalunya sejenis lauk. Sian suami. I tried so hard to make everything before he’s coming home. I can see he is in high mood bila balik rumah, rumah kemas, anak-anak dah mandi and his wife in pyjamas (sebab selalunya kalau tak mandi, isternya pakai tshirt ja.haha) and if he is lucky, isteri masak makanan kegemaran. I love looking at his eyes. It’s like sparkling (melebih pulak penerangan nya, but memang betul. Mata memang bersinar sangat).

I read somewhere, jadi ibu mesti rajin. The toughtest job, being a mother. Once enter, never quit. Kalau penat or tak sihat, still you have to be a mother. Tapi itulah, kadang-kadang terlupa jugak pada suami. Exhausted sangat and paling paling buruk perangai, bf anak sekali dengan mak nya tidor. So paling-paling simple boleh buat, memang selalunya tidor sebelah dia. Since Amna, selalunya I will sleept in between husband and anak. For me, it’s huge different. At least, bila tidor sebelah, I can smell him or hug him (eh.) jadi, esoknya rasa good sangat. Betul la kot eh bau badan suami boleh tenangkan isteri. Haha..

So pendek kata, tanya lah husband. Yang mana lebih dia prefer. So, dah tahu jawapannya, boleh la usaha penuhi kehendak suami. Mungkin dengan usaha yang sedikit tu, boleh membuahkan kemesraan. 

my second birth experience

Oh my.last post is bout the announcement and its November already. alhamdulillah. I just gave birth to a healthy baby boy on 14/8/14.

Even I experienced the lobour 1 and 4months before, still i can't differentiate between false alarm or the real contraction. Last time, Amna was born 4days before the edd. i kinda expect, it was the same with baby no 2.

Bila dah hujung-hujung pregnancy, i wish that i will give birth earlier. Lagi-lagi, kawan-kawan zaman kecik semuanya dah bersalin. I was all excited (erm, except the pain)to have a baby. Above all, I felt so heavier day by day. The heaviest weight so far. Susahnya nak bangun dari duduk, susahnya nak tunduk, cepat penat and difficult bila nak tidur malam sebab baby tersangatlah aktif. 

I've sense that maybe i'll go to the labour on 14/8/14. Sebab tarikh cantik, senang nak ingat.hehe.. So as usual, i was wake up in the middle of the night to visit the loo. It was 2 am. Rasa macam sakit sikit, but i thought it was nothing. Rasa macam sakit biasa la agaknya because it came and go for the past 2 weeks. it will go after having some rest. At 4am, again i was wake up. But this time, sakit perut tu tetap sama. tak hilang-hilang. Maybe because i eat like a p*g the day before and takes a lot of time to discard them. It was totally confusing.

So i google, macam mana sakit contraction. sempat lagi. It stated, it was like having a period pain.seriously, i havent had my period for the past 10months. So i got the idea to download contraction calculator. Hehe..it was like 5minutes in the gap. Terus kejutkan husband and told him, i am in pain. He asked weather i want to go to the hospital or not. Time tu teragak-agak. should or should not.well, ingatkan sakit biasa and bila dah siang, it will be okay. But then, bila bangun berjalan pun still sakit. So i said yes. Then he decided to bring amna as we both dont know weather this is the false alarm or not. While he prepared amna's diaper bag, i took shower and prepared myself. 

And soon as we both finished, amna was wakes up. At 5.30, we go to the hospital. Meanwhile, the contraction is not a joke. Husband was panicked (he didnt said this but i know. He even forget the way to the hospital and i have to guide him). The road was so terrible that even he drove really slow, i could still feel the bump. Itu dah macam gerakkan naga yang sedang tidor je. I cant control my anger that sometimes im shouting. Well sayang, I cant tolerate that..hahaha 

We arrived at jabatan kecemasan HSI during the subuh adzan. Hsi is really strict. If youre not 4cm dilated, they wont accept you. That what make us unsure. After registration, they asked me to go laid at bilik saringan. I was there waiting for a doctor to check while having to tahan sakit.oh my.oh my. 

After bout half an hour a dr came for a check. It was 4cm. So the baby will come today. Alhamdulillah. The labour room was fulled. Jadi, i have to waited outside. I was there sambil baca surah-surah yang mana teringat. Nurse came in, pass the pink attire, ambik kasut, bag everything, and suruh berehat. If anything, just told them. Memang dah tak rasa nak tidor pun. The contraction keep stronger.

After an hour, it getting pretty intense. A young dr tengah check another patient kat sebelah tu. She told me kalau rasa nak b*rak, told her. I said yes. Dah lama lepas tu, she heard me mengerang kesakitan. Time tu memang rasa nak nangis. tetiba je teringat, ha time nak nangis ni la dah boleh nak beranakkan amna.eh aku dah nak besalin ke.siap boleh monolog dalaman lagi.haha..

So, she asked her friend friend to check on me. Cute je orangnya, she said, 8cm. Dah boleh tolak dah ni. I was like, what, 8cm. nak tunggu bila ni. huhu..cannot tahan anymore la dr. Then nurse datang, nak tolak masuk labour room. I said, I cannot walk or sit down anymore. Rasa macam anytime je. She said yeah, it's because kepala baby memang dah kat bawah tu aje. She's nice. So paksa kan jugak duduk atas wheelchair. Nasib baik dekat. Haha..then dah sampai bilik no 12, another nurse prepare everything and check again. Katanya, dh fully dilated. Nak besalin pun boleh dah ni.

Why sama je macam amna. Orang suruh besalin, time-time tu la tak rasa. Siap boleh betahan lagi dengan sakit tu. After half and hour, alhamdulillah. Lahirlah our baby, Muhammad Ammar. Oh husband tak sempat masuk sebab dia pegang Amna.

This time, after bersalin je, terus nurse letakkan Ammar on my chest. Last time, they just show Amna and asked the gender. So i thought, bagusla (ke haku je tak ambik tau pasal prosedur ni). The beauty of newborn baby. Licin. Haha. That the first thing bout him. Takut sikit dia jatuh sebab licin ke hapa. Lepas besalin, macam wah penatnya. But then, dia senyap je. Sambung tidor. Adik ni.hahhaha...even suruh nursing pun taknak. After an hour of skin to skin, nurse wanted to wrap him. Menangis budak kecik ni. Bukan calang-calang k, memang kuat gila. Teharu mama because he want only mama. Letak je atas mama, senyap. Siap tidur macam kan sedap sangat. yerla anak.mama banyak isi.

Yes, kelahiran setiap anak sememangnya berbeza. Pertama ka, kedua ka, jalan ceritanya tetap tidak sama. sentiasa special. Nothing like the first born is the special one. No, but first born is every parents first love. But one thing for sure. Kasih sayang tu tak pernah terbahagi. actually, ianya bertambah.

The new 'news'

From the last post (that is like so last year), I bought a book ‘now you are a mother’. Neither that I know, it was so ‘near’ to me that the next thing is, I’m getting pregnant again! Haha..what a coincidence. The current pregnancy is unexpected, well how you expect, it’s not your plan. It’s what Allah had written to his entire slave. At first, I was lke er..im pregnant again? But the next day, the joy of being pregnant flooded me. But to experience the second birth, it creep me out.

Husband was the one who insisted me to take the upt test. I know, he is so excited to know and all over the moon. I was so scared to make the test but deep inside me, I knew it. I am pregnant. It just, it takes some time for me to really enjoy it. Not that I don’t want it (who doesn’t want a baby), but you know..a mama issue. 

The joy of having another addition came faster. I started to think the gender, the name and everything. Despite I worried over some matters (I tend to get worried about the first trimester and others), it was like the first one. I was overwhelmed. I’m having morning sickness (luckily, it make me lose those stubborn 5kg weight) but so far, I am healthy. Been worried about the excess weight. But after the first trimester, the lose weight came faster. My god, should watch my weight after this. I don’t want to be obese. Crying.

I don’t mind a girl or boy. I enjoy both. Hehe..But I was so sorry to Amna. My energy drained faster than I though. Thanks to my husband who so understands bout my condition. The first pregnancy,I get to met him in 2 or 3 weeks but this time, Alhamdulillah. He was here beside me.I am really hoping, our life will become much more merrier, dilimpahi rezeki and bertambah bahagia.