Her said..

Bila anak dah pandai cakap ni,seronok nak melayan. Kadang rasa lawak sangat sebab macam dah pandai dah buat ayat, tunjuk yang mana dia nak. Dah pandai nak pilih-pilih. But we need to alert always takut senang pulak dia terpengaruh dengan negative things.

Amna ni, kalau dia susah nak buat sesuatu, dia mesti akan nangis dan panggil orang suruh tolong. Tapi biasa, I would tell her to put more efforts untuk galakkan dia buat sendiri. Tadi, dia nak tarik beg keluar, lepus tu stuck. "'maa, tak boleh la maa..apa benda ni'.kahkahkah..lawak sangat sebab dia nangis-nangis sambil cakap tu.

She loves to sing. kalau dalam kereta, dia akan nyanyi lagu twinkle twinkle or lagu mama fingers la. Bila dah pandai cakap ni, kita suruh tidor pun, dia cakap taknak. Adik nak tidor tapi boleh pulak dia duk nyanyi semua lagu. Geram mak sebab adik dia pun sibuk nak tepuk tangan, takmau tidoq. Lepas tu nanti, tau-tau, dah tidoq. haha..Sebenaqnya nak tegelak tengok gelagat dia. Macam-macam kerenah skrang ni. So nak ingatkan dia, i would tell it here, nanti boleh baca balik.hehe

shattered screen

Seeing my phone's screen, my heart shattered. Sedih la sebab kena keluarkan duit nak kena ganti. Kalau nak beli phone, of course la nak iphone jugak. mengada kan. hehe..Suka sebab gambar dia cantik and lain-lain la of course. Tapi, tau la harga dia dengan currency yang herm lagu tu. So, daripada membaziaq, tukar jerla screen tu kan.

The first time, my screen got vertical lines. Like, it appears 3 black lines. After a while, the line became more and more and my screen became less sensitive. Dah la that time, i can't access because phone ada password. Dah tu, nombor tu dah jadi kurang sensitive. Macam-macam dah try nak resolve. Tak berjaya jugak. Decide nak beli phone baru jerla sebab ingat phone tu yang rosak. 

Tengah pusing-pusing dekat jusco tebrau tu, masuk machine. Niat di hati memang nak beli phone baru. Tapi, consider too many things, rasa macam berat jugak la kan. Lagi pulak, I'm not to keen on the new ip6 design. I love my ip5. Tengok ip5s around 2400, yang ip6 27++. Pikir lagi. Sebab husband cakap, kena beli sendiri supaya lagi appreciate (yg 5 ni dia hadiahkan. banyak kali anak dia baling kot, sebab tu buat syarat gitu -___-) lagi la semangat nak membeli tu kurang kan. Hahahaha... penat nak save duit. Dah la tu, Ammar pulak tengah stage yang syok baling-baling barang. Menangis la mama kalau dia baling lagi.

Keluar dulu sebab nak pikiaq-pikiaq lagi. sekali tengah jalan, tenampak kedai repair phone. Bila tanya, he charge 230+ and boleh siap dalam masa 1/2 hour. Ha terus repair. sebab save dari kena keluar lagi banyak duit. haha..yeayy, elok la dapat balik. lepas tu, time raya, si Ammar ni mengamuk apa ntah, dia baling lagi. Oh, sedih hati mama. Herm, tukar lagi. Dah tukar, dia baling lagi. Tapi sebab tak teruk sangat, ada dua tiga garis, kita hold dulu. Last night terjatuh lagi. Tengok-tengok, kembali ada vertical line tu. Pening nak baca msg watsapp semua.

P la kedai tu lagi. Last time, dia charge 200. This time, katanya harga dah naik jadi 290. memang tak dapat la nak mintak kurang. Hurm sedih jugak la sebab over budget kan. haha..tapi sampai harini, seram ok kalau tengok ja Ammar pegang phone, terus melompat ambik. Hahahaha..bagus jugak. So mama sentiasa la beringat dengan dia kan. mengamuk pun mengamuk la dik, asal phone mama tak crack lagi.

Raya

Macam biasa. Mesti versi tertinggal kapal terbang. Haha...takpa la. Takyah cerita raya puasa. Fast forward raya haji jerla kan. Disebabkan raya puasa dah kat Perlis, so this time raya haji turn Kluang. Lagipun, raya haji cuti sehari ja kan. Tak adil betul. 

Selalu kat Kluang, rasanya jarang meraya sakan. all boys lagi la kan. Lagipun, abah jadi ajk masjid. So dia uruskan pasal korban sampai petang baru dia balik. kat rumah, mak biasa masak jerla kan tengah hari tu. Macam kurang meriah la berbanding raya haji kat Perlis. hehehe..

This year, I though macam nak bagi jer budak dua orang ni merasa. Raya ke tak raya memang belakang kira. Hehe..because the first time we celebrate at Kluang, I dont even change into raya's outfit. Just wear my kain batik and tshirt. Ahahaha..so, this time, I let them wear baju melayu and baju kurung. Baju kurung recycle raya puasa punya. Ammar ja yang dapat baju melayu baru because time raya puasa yang lepas, maktok belikan sepasang baju melayu kat Ammar and another maktok tolong jahit. Nak tunggu dia pakai time raya tahun depan, entah-entah tak muat. Mama paksa ja Ammar pakai. Haha..

baju raya baru

Tetiba tahun ni,kami kena hantar berkat (or something yang orang jawa panggil.hehe) sebab mak pengasuh husband nak tengok ammar and amna. Dapat la kitaorang beraya and both kiddo merasa la berjalan-jalan kan. Siap makan raya dishes lagi. Ayam masak merah, ketupat and yang macam biasa tu kan. Sedapnyaaa.. Hurm, since Ammar can now walk, lagi la ligat si Ammar ni berjalan. Penat mengejar dia ni. Tak boleh mama duduk diam-diam makan kuih raya.-_-. Malam pulak, ada bbq sambut birthday nenek. Ha best. tapi biasa la kan. mana nak sempat pegang phone. So, kita tepek gambar raya puasa kat Perlis la haritu. Hahaha..

the only decent family photo

with my baby girl

Cuti kat Kluang, dapat la makan makanan favourite husband. Kalau balik Kluang, memang tak payah diet.Erm selalu pun tak diet kan. So takpayah nak buat cerita. Haha..

Dia kan, pagi ja nak makan nasi lemak manis/ breakfast kedai lontong wak kasim. Sedap la makan dengan ayam rendang. Lepas tu, kadang dia nak makan kat kedai tomyam fahmi. Or makan nasi ujang. So far, the best yang kami makan kat Kluang la setakat ni. Petang sabtu pulak, selalu gi pasar malam beli rojak buah dia. Memang sedap laaa. 

Starting off

25th August 2015, I was registered as a PHD student.
It's a big and tough decision. i know.
To some, it may be not, but it does matter to me.
With a mommy and wife on my list, I need to be stronger and can juggling between these 3 roles. Hopes Allah mudah kan everything.  Insyaallah.

In the hall, waiting for registration. Haii new students. Haha..

My little ammar

Wow..dah masuk bulan 10. HAHA..rasa macam lama gila tak update blog. Rajin-rajin boleh tengok balik apa yang jadi zaman dulu. Dah makin matang ni rasa macam malas pulak semua benda nak kena simpan dalam memori! Pemalas sangat.

Macam boleh bilang dengan jari ja berapa banyak duk cerita pasal Ammar ni kan. Herm meh la mama cerita pasal my little boyfriend ni. Dah nak masuk 14 bulan dah budak ni. Alhamdulillah. Dah star bejalan since 13 bulan. Which is lepas cukup ja setahun, dia dah start bejalan satu rumah. Last week raya haji, nenek belikan selipar and kasut untuk cucu-cucu dia ni sebab lupa bawa balik kasut. Takde kasut memang susah la dua orang tu. Mana nak tawaf rumah nenek kan. Rumah nenek and atok ada ayam. Seronok la pagi-pagi tengok ayam.Lepas tu, rumah nenek ni dah kat hujung jalan mati. So memang seronok nak main, tapi biasa main dalam pagar ja.

Time raya puasa haritu, siap beli dua pasang kasut. Tapi, budak ni isi kaki tebal hoi. Muat-muat ja. Tu size 4 dah. Serupa time kakak umur 16 bulan.Boleh pakai sekejap la nampaknya.Huhu..Since dua tiga hari ni, Ammar dah berlatih pakai selipar naik turun tangga. Nampak macam dah teror dah. Setiap kali keluar rumah, dah macam ayam tecabut ekor. Dan-dan takmau dukung. Nak turun tangga sendiri pulak tu. Pitam mak!

Ammar ni macam sweet heart sangat. Hari-hari cakap ngan dia, ammar, sayang mama cepat. Nanti dia mesti bagi sloppy kiss. Comel sangat. Penuh ayaq liuq. Hahaha kadang-kadang siap dua tiga kali nak kiss. Huhu..boleh la adik. Suka sangat buat muka comel Kalau dia suka dapat apa-apa, nanti dia akan senyum sengih nampak gigi sampai sepet mata. Geram betul. Tapi time merajuk ni, boleh tahan sangat. Dia kalau minta apa tak dapt, memang terus rebah badan atas lantai. Lepas tu, nangis-nagis. Huwaaaa..mama yang stress.Kadang-kadang, main dengan kakak, tak dapat benda yang kakak pegang, selamba ja tarik rambut kakak. Muka steady macam tak besalah.

Lepas tu, pagi-pagi ja, mesti ada adengan dia teriak sampai nak pengsan. Sobsob.. Ammar ni kalau dia tinggal kita takpa. Tapi, kalau kita tinggal dia, tak nampak muka ja, dia boleh teriak tu sampai lembik-lembik badan. Padahal, lepas tu kita dukung ok ja. Manja sangat! Pagi tadi pun dia tengok kakak dia pakai kasut and abah dia keluar tak bawa dia. Menangis keluar ayaq mata macam sedih sangat. Teruih moody budak ni. Bagi makan tak kena, minum susu tak kena, tengok tv tak kena. Huwaaa stress. Tapi lepas tu, dah dapat keluar rumah, bukan main laju lagi bejalan. Terus mood pun ok, kaki bejalan. Budak baru dapat kaki. Memang nak bejalan jerlaaa..

Disebabkan dia tumbuh gigi awal, 9 bulan, awal la sebab kakak dia 11 bulan baru nak keluar gigi atas tu. So, dia lagi cepat la mengigit. Sakit!! banyak kali dah cakap, dia tetap buat. Lawak kot mama dia duk marah-marah. Memang silap la mama terjerit awal-awal tu, because i didn't expect that. Since that day, rasa macam seronok kot mama dia tejerit-jerit. And dia ni macam extreme sangat kalau bf. Macam-macam gaya dah dia try agaknya. Adventurous compare to his sis time umur macam ni. But maybe, she is a girl. So sopan sikit la kan. But both ni my sweetheart. Patut la orang cakap, kita takkan tau makna sayang ikhlas sampai la ada anak sendiri.

hurm, lipstick mama penuh satu muka -__-

My sweet amna

I was having a period cramp when suddenly my girl approach me

M:kakak, perut mama sakit

A:mama sakit perut ke? *while rubbing my stomach

A:Erm sayang mama..while give me a kiss

Grab my neck and give me another kiss

Ulang-ulang sampai 4x 😭😭

Oh kakak. Mama is melting..

Tips on Weaning off the big girl

15/5/2015 The day that I decided to wean her off.

Today is the second week that I trained Amna to stop breastfeeding. At the age of 2 years and a month, finally, she stop glued to mama. But I miss staring in her eyes,I miss talking to her and I miss hearing her say 'sedap mama'. Oh Lord,  I miss her so much! she even name it as 'dude'.

my girl

When I was pregnant with Ammar, I ignore those voice that want me to stop bf her. She was only 7 months backthen. And I don't have any complication to restrict me from giving her breastmilk. Although, my supply went down, it doesn't stop her from finding her comfort zone. By the way, I'm not exclusively breastfeed her. But she constantly glued to her 'dude'.When her baby brother arrive, she get more milk supply which impossible to stop her. I once try to stop her from bf , she cry her lung out. But then, I gave in because I miss her so much. Failed miserable.


I google so many tips to weaning off a baby. It required : Strong heart. Something that I lack off. Well, how could you say no to your baby, right.
So, on that Friday night, it came in an instant. I make a decision to stop her no matter what. Talk about determination.

The first night, she wakes up and asked for 'dude'. I said, she already a big girl and asked her to sleep back. She cried of course. I hold her, hug and tell her that Mama loves her so much. In a second, she was calm down and sleep on my shoulder. She sleep through the night but again wakes up at dawn, which not so hard to put her to sleep again. I felt a bit relieve. On Saturday morning, she asked but I constantly said, she is a big girl already. Husband was really helpful but sometimes, ada jugak la dia mengalah. Haha.

I was so pissed off when he wanted to give up and asked me to continue bf her when she was out of control. I said, he will have to be responsible if he refuse to support me because all my hard effort was wasted. He then agree. There are times when she miss it, mostly when she wanted to sleep. During day, she played and eat, and played with her abah. I can see that, she turn from her comfort zone by eating so much and watched cartoon. For the time being, I'll let her watched cartoon more than her normal time.

The most heartbreaking scene for now is on the second night, she wailed her hand while saying 'jangan mama, jangan' and cry bucket. While I was constantly telling her she is a big girl, she kept repeated that she is a big girl like a mantra and mumbling in her language. It was so hard to stay stronger when you just want to gave in in any minute. The thing that stop me is, she is a big girl and I'm so tired tandem them. But it was harder on her because she saw her baby brother happily sucking while she had to stop. Like you has to stop on something that you were really fond but seeing it constantly on your face.

By the third day, it turns out okay but it was not ok for me. After fetching them from their babysitter's house, she whispered in a naughty voice, asking for her 'dude'. At that time, I was like giving up. She was mesmerized, and look at me in confusion. Haha..But then, I stop and played with her. There are time when she came and asked, but when I say no, she just continue playing and don't mind either.

So the tips to stop this big girl is constantly/repeating saying she is a big girl. Don't scream, don't push, don't mad at her. But saying mama love her so much, indeed calm her. And it takes cooperation and great effort from the husband. I choose the weekend, because he will be home all the times. So when she was coming for her 'dude', my husband will distract her and give her milk, played with her. Most important, he will soother her to sleep. Since then, she was okay. She can survive. It was no guarantee that she'll forget but I can see an improvement in her. it may takes longer times because she saw her brother latch all the times but Alhamdulillah. I prayed that Allah will grant Amna patience and make her stronger each day. Not for the my sake but for her. Mama can't stand watching you cry, baby.

Suami dan washing machine

By now, almost 3 years married, memang dah tau la antara hobi my husband ialah membasuh baju. Haha..Dia memang suka sangat kalau dapat basuh baju. Katanya, dia suka tengok baju banyak-banyak kt ampaian lepas tu kering. yerla, tapi bab melipat memang sub kat isteri. Jarang-jarang dia lipat unless isteri penat sangat or dia dah habes kerja, boleh la tengok dia rajin tangan nak lipat baju.

So, this was a year ago. One day, dia on washine machine, tapi nothing happened. Being him, memang menggelabah terus ajak isteri beli washing machine baru. Husband ni memang tak boleh la kalau dia tengok bakul baju penuh. Rasanya, dia pening kot tengok baju banyak. Hahaha..So, isteri memang percaya la dengan dia sebab memang zone laundary tu, jarang-jarang jadi tempah persinggahan. hahahaha

Siap dah beli, sampai ja machine baru nak test, tengok-tengok, plug yang rosak. Haaa..memang rasa nak gelak sangat. Habis duit beribu padahal kalau check before tu, boleh save duit. Tapi takpa la. Memang dah takdir nak pakai machine baru kot. So, dah dekat setahun pakai, tetiba setiap kali basuh baju ja, bunyi macam bising nya machine tu. Sudah la. tapi memang kami pun buat dek je as long as dia buat kerja cukup la kot. Dah satu hal pulak kan nak kena pi tukar or apa-apa, so biar jerla dulu.

Until last friday, when i was trying to spin baju budak-budak tu, that machine suddenly keep repeating. so maybe load dia kurang kan, dah ubah posisi, susun balik bagi berat dia sama, still nothing change pun. Dah menggelabah dah suami tu. Dia kan penggemar washing machine. Dia punya idea, nak suh repair then nak trade in lepas tu p beli machine baru. Ha sudah dia ni. I kept pressuring him, p balik kedai tu, suh depa mai repair la. Ewah kata 5 years warranty la bla bla bla..Takpa la kalau tak basuh sehari dua kan. Daripada nak melabur lagi beribu. Hehe..ni pun, dia dah pikiaq nak p hantaq baju-baju kat kedai dobi mana pulak.. haila cik abang ni. Lawak sangat perangai.

Nasib baik isteri susah-sudah paksa p balik kedai tu, cari warranty card and kedai tu pun baik hati, suh tipu ja bila beli. Haha..at last, datang la technician dia betulkan machine tu. Rupanya, dia bunyi bising sebab alat tarik air (taktau la nama apa) rosak. So that's why, asek ketek ketek bunyi dia. Tak dapat tarik air. And now, dah okay. Fuh, dah betenang la si suami tu. Sebab dah boleh basuh baju. But now, banyaknya baju nak kena lipat. Sapa nak tolong.Harapan sangat nak mintak tlg budak bedua tu. Mungkin satgi, mak dia yang kena kutip baju merata-rata. Hurm..

3-step skincare

Every time I watch Korean drama, I can't help but noticed that, they have lots of beauty products on their dressing table. And usually, the actress will portrayed wearing a night cream and any others before their night scene. Cantiknya kulit depa. Everyone know Korean is so meticulous on their beauty care, so it make me wanna take care of mine too. Don't think i'm the suitable person to talk bout the skincare since my skin is not like a porcelain. But skincare is the basic care that everyone should know. I have so many scar from the previous acne, and the combination of dry and oily at the t-zone.

I've tried so many products but mostly from the drug store brand, and some that came with affordable price. Previously, I used seaweed from Bodyshop. It give great effect, my skin doesn't feel so dry anymore. But after using it for 2 years, I don't think it give the same effect as before. So I switch to Moisture White shiso facial wash. Just one pump, it give your skin the soft texture.

But then, I was so in love with the Clinique long before. Since pregnant with Ammar, it was like mengidam to use the 3-step. Haha.Takde mengidam makanan tapi mengidam pencuci muka. So then, sementara nak tunggu white shiso tu habis, I always visited clinique website. Man, it was so addictive. Full of colours and it feels like I wanna grab everything on the web. Nasib baik poket tak berapa kembung. Haha..


So, I purchase the 3-step skincare during Christmas promotion. And gave 2 free miniature. For me, the price is affordable and it can last for 4 months as told by the beauty consultant (but mine is still much more, I can said, it can last for 3 more months). Eversince using that, I can see that, my skin feels brighter (not become fairer but brighter) and the pore become smaller. Well, the scar still there but I kinda feel like, it improves my skin texture. My sister have been using the same with different formula, she said the same. So I guess, for the time being, I'll continue using that.

The reason why I shared it here is, I never been so passionate bout any skincare before. I love beauty product but mostly, it something that easily access and cheap. Haha... And now, I surf the website EVERYDAY and admire all the products. Oh, my next wishlist is, even better serum. I've heard that, you need to wear serum to improve your skin and now, I'm going to be 30 next year, so why don't start a regime for better skin.

Picnic

Plan untuk berpicnic memang dah lama sangat dalam list, tapi selalunya memang tak menjadi memandangkan mamanya malas nak prepare food. Haha..Because we were on tight budget, jadi memang tak ada la aktiviti melawat mall. Lebih kepada, bring Amna outside. Hari-hari terkurung dalam rumah, so hujung minggu memang wajib la bawa dia keluar.

On saturday morning last week, woke up and prepare nasi lemak, sambal bilis and sandwiches. Tugas husband pulak memang tolong mandi and siapkan anak-anak dia tu. So, off we go to Tanjung Balau.

Tanjung Balau is situated at Kota Tinggi district. It was 1hour drive from Jb through Senai-Desaru highway. Even namanya highway, tapi jalannya banyak juga yang rosak. maybe sebab tu laluan lori .We arrived around 1pm. Tanjung Balau is among the favourite spot for picnicking but on that day, macam tak ramai orang pulak.

Rupanya, it was too windy. Sampai ja situ, nampak tingginya ombak. I was freaked out. Semenjak kejadian tsunami, i think i am a bit frantic of the sea. Selalu pikir macam-macam sampaikan selalu mimpi pasal ombak kuat. 

Sebab kan memang dah sampai, bentang jugak la tikar dekat bawah pondok. Kuatnya angin sampaikan boleh terbang bantal tidur Amna. Makan pun memang tak feel sangat. Kena pegang macam-macam takut barang pun ikut terbang. Makan laju-laju, sambil berdoa tak de kejadian apa-apa pun. Ramai jugak yang mati lemas. Dari cerita penjual aiskrim (suami terlebih ramah. Interview pakcik jual aiskrim), last month je 3 orang mati. Inalillah.

Overall, ada la tandas awam (kena bayar tapi macam takde apa tindakan pun. Nak kata bersih tak jugak), tempat makan. Kedai kraftangan, muzium nelayan. chalet. And that day, ada kenduri kahwin and family day kot, sebab chalet penuh ja orang berpakaian sukan and pakai cantik-cantik macam nak p kenduri.haha..

Dah habes makan, ingatkan nak balik, But, i asked husband bawa pusing-pusing Desaru. Sebelah Tanjung Balau je rupanya, around 10 km. Disebabkan banyak sekolah, kolej, and hotel, Bandar Penawar ni macam membangun jugak. selalu dengar nama tapi tak pernah sampai. Rupanya, bandar Penawar ni memang dekat sangat dengan pantai Desaru.

We paid rm4 to enter pantai Desaru. I was oppressed la sebab macam pantai kot, kena bayar jugak. Lagipun nampak macam ombak tinggi macam tanjung balau (obviously, sebelah-sebelah je) boleh ke nak mandi.

Desaru

Amaran merah

Nampak banyak red flag, memang tak boleh la mandi-mandi. Tapi ramai jugak mat and minah salleh mandi. Diaorang suka la kot boleh surfing. Husband bawak Amna jalan dekat pantai. Ingatkan dia  just nak ambik gambar je. Malas nak join dengan si tembam ni and I was a bit scared of the waves. Hehe..So apaknya saja bawa. We bring her to the beach when she was 1 years old but she cried!Haha..Dia takut dengan ombak yang kena kaki kot.

So while husband was taking her photo, suddenly ombak kuat terkena la si budak kecik tu. Dia diam je. Husband pun diam tak nak takut kan dia kan. Tengok-tengok, suka sangat dengan pantai. Siap taknak balik. Sambil tunjuk nak main lagi pantai. So second trip, again apaknya bawa lagi main air. 

Seram jugak dengan ombak tu but i trust my husband. Haha..Amna duduk je kat gigi air tu. Bila ombak kuat, kena la sikit kaki dia. Jadilah dapat rasa main pantai sekejap. I think, my husband suka la tu sebab ada geng nak mandi pantai. Isterinya memang tak minat pantai. Posing tepi pantai, ha yang tu confirm I suka bang. Haha.. Dah tulis baru teringat. Tak sempat bagi si adik ni rasa main pasir. Hehe..Mamanya tak larat nak dukung lama-lama. Kakaknya main pantai, mama paksa si adik menyusu dalam kereta. Kahkahkah...tunggu la adik besar sikit, lepas ni boleh join abah and kakak ok sayang. Hehe..

So, nanti boleh la buat list lagi activities for weekends. Takkan nak melawat shopping mall aja. Memang koyak poket suamiku. hehe..

2015

The first entry in 2015.

New fresh, new start and new hope.

Hopefully, tercapai la some of the new year resolutions.